Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Just for laughs..
__________
On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"
So God agreed.
On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."
The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?"
And God agreed.
On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day, God created man and said: "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."
But man said: "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."
So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you.
__________
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face." "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE . God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
__________
__________
On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"
So God agreed.
On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."
The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?"
And God agreed.
On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day, God created man and said: "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."
But man said: "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."
So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you.
__________
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face." "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE . God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
__________
♥ kC was here, 10:29 AM.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Back for updating of my blog. Haven't really got the "feel" to constantly update but over the past month, I've achieved something that I always wanted.
The coveted Class 3 Driving License. I've got it.
From the day I passed my Final Theory, there was always this pressure that's lingering inside of me. Although I know that my uncle-dad (direct translation from how I address my uncle) will coach me well, I still have that feeling. I really don't want to disappoint him by failing it when the Test comes..
So last week, I took my Test and passed it. Now I can say, been there and done that. 1st try with 12 demerit points. Some people around me say it's really a great job done, but here, I would like to give big credits to my uncle-dad. And of course, my daddy up high too. Really prayed like crazy since the previous night of my Test. And it was the worst during the round in the circuit. My left leg was trembling like crazy and I felt that I would lose control of my clutch pedal. Luckily, it didn't happen. And while doing the slope, I backrolled! Gosh, I've never backrolled while moving from slope and it happened during my Test. Shucks.
And from the worst, it became horrendous. The route that I was assigned to was scary as well. If the Tester wanted me to go the original route, I think sure CMI. Cos there's one part during the route where you'll have to filter 2 lanes and do a U-turn. I always kan chiong spider there and do stupid things. And guess what? He cut short the route and took a left turn which meant that I can "siam" the U-turn. WOOTS LA!
Went for a little spin around the neighbourhood and back to office. On the way back, school children taking the zebra crossing. Piece-o-cake. xD
Back to the starting/ending point, I followed the Tester back to his office. Uncle-dad was there and I told him, "Sure can get liao!" and caught up with the Tester. Sure enough, the result was what I dreamt of. So the rest of story, you guys know already. Called up Deb Dear and Mummy to share the good news. Sms'd Diana to inform her as well.
-Mission Accomplished-
Oh yes, today's the 1 month mark of my employment. 2 more months to go for probation! I'll stay strong and finish what I've set out to do. Got a new colleague who came in today and he's 4 years younger than me. He's an interesting guy, I'm sure this week will pass fast with him around to chat with during work. Can't stand the silence while working for the past week.. Really.
Okays, seriously, I'll make it a point to update more frequently. I know it's hard, but I'm gonna try. Okay okay? Don't give me the "sian diao" face la, I'm really trying. Really.
Alright, I shall end this post with a crappy pic of myself. Be back soon all~
The coveted Class 3 Driving License. I've got it.
From the day I passed my Final Theory, there was always this pressure that's lingering inside of me. Although I know that my uncle-dad (direct translation from how I address my uncle) will coach me well, I still have that feeling. I really don't want to disappoint him by failing it when the Test comes..
So last week, I took my Test and passed it. Now I can say, been there and done that. 1st try with 12 demerit points. Some people around me say it's really a great job done, but here, I would like to give big credits to my uncle-dad. And of course, my daddy up high too. Really prayed like crazy since the previous night of my Test. And it was the worst during the round in the circuit. My left leg was trembling like crazy and I felt that I would lose control of my clutch pedal. Luckily, it didn't happen. And while doing the slope, I backrolled! Gosh, I've never backrolled while moving from slope and it happened during my Test. Shucks.
And from the worst, it became horrendous. The route that I was assigned to was scary as well. If the Tester wanted me to go the original route, I think sure CMI. Cos there's one part during the route where you'll have to filter 2 lanes and do a U-turn. I always kan chiong spider there and do stupid things. And guess what? He cut short the route and took a left turn which meant that I can "siam" the U-turn. WOOTS LA!
Went for a little spin around the neighbourhood and back to office. On the way back, school children taking the zebra crossing. Piece-o-cake. xD
Back to the starting/ending point, I followed the Tester back to his office. Uncle-dad was there and I told him, "Sure can get liao!" and caught up with the Tester. Sure enough, the result was what I dreamt of. So the rest of story, you guys know already. Called up Deb Dear and Mummy to share the good news. Sms'd Diana to inform her as well.
-Mission Accomplished-
Oh yes, today's the 1 month mark of my employment. 2 more months to go for probation! I'll stay strong and finish what I've set out to do. Got a new colleague who came in today and he's 4 years younger than me. He's an interesting guy, I'm sure this week will pass fast with him around to chat with during work. Can't stand the silence while working for the past week.. Really.
Okays, seriously, I'll make it a point to update more frequently. I know it's hard, but I'm gonna try. Okay okay? Don't give me the "sian diao" face la, I'm really trying. Really.
Alright, I shall end this post with a crappy pic of myself. Be back soon all~
♥ kC was here, 11:29 PM.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Well, here I am. Apologies for the lack of updates.
3rd week of work ended. Been to the Customer Service Centre and well, I got to experience the frontline job scope finally. It's interesting seeing how customers come and go hopping mad, sometimes. Overall, it's been an assurance to me that I can be of help to people who needs my assistance when they walk in.
Been told today of some insider news from my senior and it wasn't what I expected. Was told to go into the office cos she wanted to talk to me. And darn, was quite worried cos I was wondering if I screwed anything up or what. Instead, I was told of some stuffs that I never imagine it would happen so fast so furious.
Will update you guys tomorrow so stay tuned.
Here's something I must really thank God for.. Favor.
It's not something that comes easily, really. Some people who aren't blessed with this "favor", it's really harder for them to start things off whether in work or socially. I can't exactly phrase it out properly.. Aiyah, nevermind.
My TP's next week! And I'm going gaga over it. Nervous and scared.
I really want to get it done with first try.
Back to prayers and off to bed. Later all~
3rd week of work ended. Been to the Customer Service Centre and well, I got to experience the frontline job scope finally. It's interesting seeing how customers come and go hopping mad, sometimes. Overall, it's been an assurance to me that I can be of help to people who needs my assistance when they walk in.
Been told today of some insider news from my senior and it wasn't what I expected. Was told to go into the office cos she wanted to talk to me. And darn, was quite worried cos I was wondering if I screwed anything up or what. Instead, I was told of some stuffs that I never imagine it would happen so fast so furious.
Will update you guys tomorrow so stay tuned.
Here's something I must really thank God for.. Favor.
It's not something that comes easily, really. Some people who aren't blessed with this "favor", it's really harder for them to start things off whether in work or socially. I can't exactly phrase it out properly.. Aiyah, nevermind.
My TP's next week! And I'm going gaga over it. Nervous and scared.
I really want to get it done with first try.
Back to prayers and off to bed. Later all~
♥ kC was here, 11:03 PM.
